illumination

On Illumination.
 ____    ______

To become Illuminated means
no less than Refusing to follow
the mindless flock of this majority,
and seeking instead the Hidden
Divinity which exists in each of us.

It's not about a "War between
the Forces of Good and Evil.",
but rather coming to the Realization
that both forces are Necessary
and must instead be Balanced
.

back into my shell

Back Into MY Shell.
_______________

now i suppose it's
really goodnight..

and bye,

or.. "BetterBye"

BestBye..

Bye which lingers
in ones Sight..!!

Bye that never
seems to Die!!

(Because I never
got it Right.)

My Oh My.
this one would
make a decent
Poem as Well!

I like Pieces
Born From My
Life...

(which has always
oddly teetered between
Heaven and Hell.)

but..Goodnight,
and Bye...

(I'm crawling back
into My Shell.)

j.stephen.h

all of the intention of a fresh picked rose

All of The Intention of a Fresh Picked Rose.
______________________________

Have you ever
Awakened into
A Nightmare,..
while wondering
when The Nightmares
were going
to End?

Kill The lights and
Fade to Gray!!

(Lose Faith in
Love Pretend.)

I wrote a Pretty Prose ..
which had all of the
Intention of a Fresh
Picked Rose.

But soon Tore Every
Petal Off.

(before Love had
a Chance To Grow.)

She Loves Me!!"
She Loves me Not!!"

( I suppose I'll never Know.)
..............

This Nightmare is
beginning to be
my Favorite Reality. .
Because I know
what to Expect.

Gray Walls,
and Hopeless
Dreams,..full of
Puppets who
View Themselves
in Retrospect!!

with Pretty Prose
bearing every Intention
of Loves Sweet Memory!,..

A Rose which
Masks the lingering
Scent of My
Lone Heart's Death!!

(Now and For Eternity.)

j.stephen.h

A Purgatory in My Head.

A Purgatory In My Head.
_______________

I Feel Dead,
or Deader than
Dead..with Love
a mere Purgatory
In My Head..
and yet I Smile..
like Death.

(though I wish
to Frown instead.)

I met an Angel,
(named Regret.)
who showed me
what It was to
Feel..
She left
Me Strangled
in Our Bed.

(of nails which
stab but seldom
Kill.)

Yet.. I'm Dead..
Hell,..Deader
than Dead.

(with Love a
mere Purgatory
In My Head.)

J.Stephen.H.

a two cent destiny.

A Two-Cent Destiny.
___________________

But then again..
what truly can?
Separate The Animal.

(from Man.)

When looking
through The Heads'
Tin Can..

(Trapped in
This Psychotic
Mystery Channel!!)

Wondering where
it All Began.
_

In My Dreams,..
Chaos Mated
with Purpose..
and Conceived
The Bastard "Me."

Yet in Spite this
Nothing Here
seems Worthless!

(in Fact I just
spent Two Red
Cents, To Change
My Destiny.)
_

j.stephen.h

(just a bit of
abstract curiosity
I reckon.)

dual perspectives.

Dual Perspectives.
________________

Years Ago,
I sought Love
behind every
Hateful Symbolism.
(disguised as
A Metaphor.)

But it was
Never Enough.
(and I've mostly
Forgotten what
I was Looking
For.)

The Moral of
The Story is:
It's Subjective..
and Whenever
you Reminisce
The Blade
Cuts Different!

(since Life and
Art are Dual
Perspectives.)

_


j.stephen.h

the lovers who wept razorblades.

the lovers who wept razorblades
_____________________

I imagine that if you
wept razor-blades,
you would already be
Faceless my love..

and, (whether you
choose to believe
it or not) I used to
Know The Feeling.

My Heart wasn't
always like this
you know..

Wrapped in
Barbed Wire,
and surrounded
by a Gray Wall
of Forced Indifference.

I used to Smile
at (nearly) everything.

In Youth the World
was an Amusement
Park Ride I never
wanted to get off of,..

yet now..It is a
Terrifying thing
which increases
my awareness of
Mortality..to the
point where I see
Death Frowning
around Every
Corner. (waiting
to embrace Me.)

Yet I don't want
to be like this
My Love..

A Selfish, Insecure
Tyrant who forms
a Master /Slave
Dialogue between
our Burning Hearts...
I want to be the
Torch of Liberty
which inflames
The Entirety of
Your Being..
allowing your
Soul to Shine
Bright Enough!

(For all of The
Reading World
to See.)
_

So...
Let's Ride
this Crazy
Ride together,
you and I..

laughing through
every Joy and
Woe, as our Eyes
Drink In the
Craziest of Scenes!

Otherwise I'm
trapped Here..
Alone..with a
Head full of
Razor blades.

(which makes my
Grim Soul Faceless
as I Weep.)

j.stephen.h.

so the world wont see me cry

so the world wont see me cry
__________________

I'm grateful for every
moment good and bad
we shared...

grateful for your fiery
Nature..

(and your ever-
changing hair.)

Grateful for those
few months of
"Forever"..

grateful for The
Sun, and Storms.

with you it's always
Perfect Weather!

(even when I
Am Forlorn.)

I'm Grateful for
the One Thousand
apologies you accepted
out of Grace.

Grateful even for
the Tears.

(I've Dreamed of
Tasting on your Face.)

I'm grateful Bellus,
and so you know,
I Never Will regret..

The Love which
Burned Between Us
which I cannot just
"Forget"!

I'm Grateful that
it's Dark Outside,
and Shadows Paint
the Sky..

In Fact I Pray
for Endless Night!

(so the World
won't see me Cry.)

J.Stephen.H.

eternity locked.

Eternity Locked.
(a brief tribute to
the Style of Glenn
Marchand.)
________________

My Fading Love,
(a Closing Gate.)
I did not want, to
Desecrate, The
Hard-Won Trust,
you had in Me,
but Lies Corrupt!
(and Lust Misleads.)

You Were The
Key, To My Hearts
Door, Eternity
Locked!

(Forevermore.)

J.Stephen.H.

This is a Brief Tribute
To the Style of The
Profound Writer Mr.
Glenn Marchand.
I only wish it did
Him better Justice.

the rabbits abyss

The Rabbits Abyss.

___________

The rabbit hole
just became an
ABYSS Alice!!

shall we sit down
and dance?

exchanging words
of Loving Malice..
to sever forever our
senseless Romance!!

Be sure to point

out ALL of my

flaws..so that this

world is given the

most appropriate

picture of my stark

depravity..

The Mad Hatter
and I (in Me) shall
sit this one out.

(though I do 

thoroughly enjoy a 

bit of Madness

with my Mourning
Tea.)

love..sincerely...

XIII

weeping fists and a chalkboard brain

Weeping Fists, and A Chalkboard Brain.
______________________

As I stand here
weeping with
Bloody Fists..
A Proud Wall
becomes The
Victim of My
Vengeful Tears..

but is LOVE
supposed to
Feel like this?

Like you're
Trapped
awake inside of
a coma!!!

(where it seems
you have not slept
in Years.)

Is Love a few
indifferent one-liners
which seemingly
express The Heart's
Fond Sentiments?

Followed by eternities
of Silence...as you BLEED
your Soul out endlessly
in extravagant sentences!!

I feel Love's
Fingernails scratching
the Life out of My
Dusty Chalkboard
Brain..

and..if LOVE
is madness?
I am TRULY
INSANE...

but..nonetheless..

(No fists shall
ever weep their
vengeance upon
Those Walls again.)

j.stephen.h.

oxymoronical love

an Oxymoronical Love.

________________

She makes my

Head an Oxymoron..

so that I sit

(calmly impatient)

on Dark Mornings.

(waiting for The

Sun to Rise at Dawn.)

My World had always

been Beautifully Ugly.

A Duality of Opposing

Extremes,

until she Planted Her

Timeless Seed In

Me!

Which led to Immortality!

(down A Broken Path of

Dying Dreams.)

She can't stand the way

I Love so Hatefully..

(consumed by Trusting

Jealousy.) Or Accept

This Ever Burning Flame,

which has chilled my

Monster Heart with RAGE!!

(since The Old Age of

MY Infancy.)

_

I must Begin This with

a Better Bad Ending..

to Honor the Dishonor of

intended Themes,..

and stifle the immensity of

Silent Screams!,..

which bleed  forth from

 the Shallow Depths!

(of my stupidly intelligent

Psyche.)

Oh..how I Hate Loving

so Oxymoronically!..

yet..the Brokenness of

it all completes me!

As I sit here watching

the Noon Day Moon.

(Life's Madness

restoring My Sanity.)

But,.. nonetheless I

still Laughingly Weep!!

(For that Angel who

brings out  The Civilized

Beast in Me.)

J.Stephen.H.

scars of survivial

Scars of Survival.
________________

She is A Very
Beautiful Girl,
Who seeks to
Share her Heart
with the World..

Displaying Scars
of Survival through
Restless Art...
which makes the
Statement:

"Hide not from
The Dark!"

(but rather
Embrace it.)

_

While I feed
them Shadows
from My Head..

never removing
This Intellectual
Mask.

(which would
Reveal that I
Am Faceless.)
__

She sees
the Inner-Parts
of me Broken..

and does not
look away..

as I Drown
in Those Deep,
Mysterious Oceans,
(of Her Eyes)
and Wish that
I could Stay!!!!
_

I know

(with a

Certainty

Beyond Hope)

that I shall

see Her One

Day..

Loved,

Admired..

and Safe..

(absent of

Her Former

Sorrow.)

Cherished

by The World!

(I seek now

To Escape.)

J.Stephen.H.
__________________

This is (once again)
For the Lovely Girl
Who's Eyes Consume
The Stars..

(You know My Love
Who You Are.)

I Wish I could be Different.
(but such Is The Nature of
My Scars.)

jsh

at first glance

At First Glance.

______________

There will 

always be 

Frauds 

(out there)

selling 

Imaginary

Scars..

Always  

A Creative 

Clod.

(wishing  

it could Be 

A Star.)

Always A 

Symbolism

Contained..

(with a 

Symbol.)

The Hidden 

Truth of A 

Soul who

Craves 

Pain..

(Enraged 

at  Those 

It Could 

Never  

Resemble.)

Creators,

Imitators..

and 

Liberators..

Hand in Hand

Dancing The

Dance That

Artists Dance..

Struggling to

Prove Who Is

Greater.

(But really 

it's  obvious

at First 

Glance.)

j.s.h.

any sunny doomsday afternoon.

any sunny doomsday afternoon.
__________________________

We were both night owls
who dreamed of the moon..

every sunny doomsday afternoon..
sitting by the lake in june.

(wishing the snow would grace
us soon.)

Every tear meant the death of
something sacred..

like the realities of life which
stripped us naked!,..

exposing us to a Bitter World!

(without a security blanket.)

The last time we tried this
everything around us suffered..

but we decided "what the hell?"..

and chewed on more romantic
nails...

because neither could live or
die without the other!!...

(on any sunny doomsday afternoon.)

j.stephen.h.

the devil of self discovery

The Devil OF
Self Discovery...
____________

Lo..t'was My
First experience
in Hell..

and so I laughed
the Laugh that
Madness Laughs!

(when Conversing
with Itself.)

Mouth of Love
Fisted Shut...
Soul (and ego)
sorely Bruised!,

as Time
remained a
Heartless Slut!

(Lying Broken
on the Floor
Abused.)
_

"Come and see.."

(said The Serpent.)

"Come and See!"

"You cannot
Repent Mr.
Hennessee..!"

("it is far too late
for thee")

"Since thou hast
consumed The
Devil Berries,
(grown in The
Garden of Misery.)
and heard me strum
My Evil Strings!!!"

(ignorance was
Truly Bliss..it seems.)

_

T'was My
First
(and Last)
Experience
in Hell..

and I wept
Black Tears
the Devil
Weeps!

(Upon
Discovering
Himself.)

J.Stephen.H

in the middle of a goodnight love song.

In The Middle of A Goodnight Love Song.
_______________________________

One can only
guess, why you
would choose to
mention some
self -perceived
wrong..in the
Middle of A
Goodnight Love
Song..

Thrusting fierce
that Hateful Blade!
(which I should
have expected all
along.)

My Praises were
there..regardless
that the world did
not see them..

and your image
Haunts Me
Everywhere!
Though my Heart
remains a Mausoleum!

(where Angels
lay with Spiders
in their Hair.)

Yes Love...
"IN Love"
I am a Child..
who feels
sharp the
Sting of every
word, whether
belligerent, or
Mild...

Because I
am a Vagabond
of Romance..
who wanders
still The
Wilderness
Wild!

Searching for
the Perfect
Style.

(to ease
My Cuts.)

J.Stephen.H.

cupids graveyard

A Dedication upon Cupids Graveyard.
____________________________

I dedicate this..
To every dedication
ever stripped from
the Walls of Love,
and Cast into Cupid's
Graveyard.

(where Lies
My Heart.)

Deep is the cut,
but salty this
wound which
bleeds dark
nothing!!

Angels may as
well sit watching
Porn, snorting
coke, and cussing...

telling sailor jokes
to scared infants in
the cradle of Doom!

( minds laid
worst for the rutting.)

J.S.H.

the mighty sea

The Mighty Sea.
__________

The Sea is
full of Give
and Take,

consuming
All,

(within it's
Wake.)

Spitting back
The Bones of
Men..

Or Pretty
Pearls.

(as each
Tide Breaks.)
_

It serves to
remind me
How Small
We Are,

Ants confined
beneath the Stars,

Sands upon
an Endless Beach!

(or Lightning
Bugs Within a
Jar.)
_

Yet how I
Love The
Mighty Sea!..

I'm filled
with An Inner
Peace,

and no amount
of Storms, nor
Grief,

can steal My
Hearts Tranquility!

For even when
The Tides do cease,
The Waves shall
NEVER Break!

(The Ocean Inside
Of Me.)

J.Stephen.H.

the electric air of endless love

the electric air of endless love.
____________________

What a Joy
it is To Breath
(My Dove)

The Electric
Air of Endless
Love!

and see
(on Earth)
A Human
Angel!

(who rivals
The Stars
Above.)

Your Eyes
have softened
MY Heart,
(of Stone.)

and put to
rest My Inner
Fears.

Of Dying
Here.

(Alone.)

Yes..
A Joy it
is indeed!
(my dove)

To Breath!

(This electric
air of endless
love.)

j.stephen.h.

the market

The Market.
____________

The Market?!..

the Market is
the Number One
Killer of Our
Finest Art..

which Makes
a Whore of The
Once Creative
Heart!

You become
a mere Image..
shaped by shallow
testimonials..
and the opinions
of Thoughtless Critics...

who strip away the
delicacies of ones Soul
till nothing remains!

(but an Empty
Gimmick.)
_

If ever I cast
my poetic thoughts
before the market-place,
it shall be to SELL
the Idea that
Art is Present
in Every Woman,
Man, and Place...

while Experience
is The Paint which
shapes!

(that Ever-Living
Canvas.)

j.stephen.h.

an otherwise gray tune

the colorization of a Tune.
___________________

yeah..art
probably
 talks to
itself too..

(and we're
both probably
crazy.)

Art Like a Fox,
Or Some Sigh.

(that was a whimper
before death saved
me).

(insert F-Word
Here for Colorization
of an Otherwise
Gray Tune.)

jsh

sep8thsoundsthesame

September 8th Sounds The Same.
_____________________________

september 8th.

I don't know what
to think.

maybe it was
A Single Thought
That Fucked us to
Begin With?

or maybe we
Focus On Every
Bad Thing?!

(and forget we
have A Kid.)
_

Maybe  Tomorrow
will be a Dandy?

Opening up New
Worlds To See.

Revealing Itself
With Bloody
Candy!!

(and maybe
Only I Am There,
TO Watch Us
Weeping.)
_

Maybe we're
All  Fucked
The Same?

Puppets In
God's Masquerade.

And Maybe
I've just Drank...

(Maybe Life
and Death Will
Feel The Same.)

j.s.h.
_
shut up...
you're just
ONE VOICE
in  World of
Many...
and Eventually?

(you will Sound
The Same)

j..somethin...
somethin...
H.

eye of the tiger.

Oh..neat. That song eye of the tiger is on... it makes me think of my father watching his beloved "rocky" movies with sly stallone.. i use to get a kick out of him..when he would playfully be-bop around to the music throwing wild punches at the air like a drunken shadow boxer trying to make his son smile.(and it always worked too.)

his head

His head feels like a Radio Station,
full of white noise....the songs of the
dead. (which surprisingly seem like
the most Poetic Conversations.)

Mr. Heartful Outer-Empty.

Mr. Heartful Outer-Empty.
____________________

He makes the

Sadness Rage..

Burning all of

The colors;

(until they Fade.)

and though one
might assume he's

empty, (judging

by his Face.)
his Heart bursts
at the seams.

(Full of A Love
His Mind Can't
seem to Take.)

There is
Electricity
in His Eyes..
they see the
World as A
Writing Device.

Plots which
thicken, cool,
and quicken..
depending on
The Time.

(but more often
it's Hell Than
Paradise.)

Mr. Heartful
Outer-Empty..
confuses "I"
with "We"..
uncertain about
who's The Enemy.

(Ego, or
Collectivity.)

And so He
Makes The
Sadness Rage!..

To avoid the
Ocean of Pain.

(in which He's
Drowning.)

J.Stephen.H.